Saturday, 7 April 2012

Almost made it

I thought that I had almost made a week...but I defeated myself. Knowingly and willingly, and dare I say sinfully ....though I a trying to keep that sort of loaded language out of this. What happened? I started to get Pangs when I was cooking a meal for my sister. In fact as I was on my down there I was feeling a bit resentful that I was having to go at all when I could have been home getting smashed. Any way we had a couple of glasses of was revolting stuff ...tasted like vinegar. I couldn't wait to get home so I could have a proper drink. Now let me say this again! I am not a person who can drink. I have no sense of proportion. I can't stop. And Fuck! I lay in bed this morning thinking .....What did I write in that letter to my boss while I was pissed out of my brain? Thank goodness when I checked it was all fairly innocuous . Today I have a busy day! And though I feel a bit fuzzy thank God I am not really hung over And so, I beGin again. God give me strength.

Sunday, 1 April 2012


Heading up for the second day in a row!
Had to self-talk a bit in the late afternoon, as I watched a movie about people having fun drinking, I felt real pangs. This is maniacal, they were not drinking properly or well. And I longed for the short term thrill. This is mad, I thought. Thank goodness there was someone else here...and thank goodness I didnt waste anther $60 on gin that I would have to pour down the sink after the morning guilts.
So a small victory